Little House
by Courtney JoAnne
Summary: Poland knows something is wrong with his best friend, but what happens when he brings up something he didn't mean to? Poland/Lith Song Fic. T for Suicidal themes


A/N:I finished this a week ago but sense it was on my laptop and I had no net on my laptop, I had no way to post it up.  
Little House is by the Fray.  
1591 Words  
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_She doesn't look, _

_She doesn't see,_

_Opens up for nobody,_

_Figures out, she figures out…_

"Like, come on Lith! I didn't invite you out here to look all depressing and stuff!"

"Mm… Sorry Feliks… I guess I just have a lot on my mind lately."

"Well you can at least look at where you are!" a small hand came to the taller man's chin and forced him to look up to the golden fields in front of him. The other had been worrying him lately, and Lithuania wouldn't tell him why, so he was hoping a relaxing change in atmosphere might bring the other around.

"Oh!" he looked surprised and then his worried eyes softened. "I didn't think it would still be here." He sighed almost contently, looking around the place of his childhood in slight curiosity for just a moment before sitting down on the rock that had been his seat of choice as a kid.

"Well, like, of course it would be Toris. Did you really think I would like, let them destroy this place? God, no faith…" the blonde man fell back under the tree across from the rock, looking at his friend as he got lost in his thoughts again. "…Toris! …Toris! …Liet!" the other gave a response the last time, and Feliks frowned.

"Sorry, what were you saying?" the young man tried a gentle smile for his best friend, hoping the other would jump back into what he was saying in his normal animated way, but the other continued to stare at him.

"You, like, wouldn't respond to your name…." he said flatly, "Like, what is wrong Toris? You know I am here for you!" Poland looked at him, trying to hold back the tears of worry for his friend. He normally told him if something was really wrong like it obviously was.

"Oh…" he sighed and looked down, "I am sorry. I guess Russia has just had me isolated for a while, and he never calls me by my name so…." He sighed a second time, closing his green eyes. "And nothing is wrong Feliks, don't worry. I just have to decide upon a few things before I get back..."

_The narrow lines, she can't decide_

_Everything short of __**suicide**_

_Never __**hurts**__, nearly __**works**__._

"Like, stop saying sorry all the time…" there had been a short silence after Toris's harsh words, but he wouldn't let the conversation end like that. In fact, Poland had decided that the conversation was not allowed to end until he had the answers he was looking for. "Especially when you have _obviously_ done nothing wrong Lith. I understand being with Russia like, kinda has changed you and all, but that still doesn't make me stop worrying. Especially after…." He trailed off, wishing that he hadn't even started to bring that up because he knew the other was smarter than that.

Toris sat quietly for a minute, though the tension was building up in the air. Lithuania wouldn't let his anger explode like that though. Feliks didn't deserve the brunt end of his hatred and anger, especially sense all he was doing was worrying.

"After what?" he finally asked, though his voice came out colder than it was supposed to and held an edge. He winced at how harsh it sounded to himself, but the words kept coming. "After the scene?! After they found me 'sprawled out on the floor, suffering from an overdose of painkillers?!" His voice was laced with hatred, though he didn't know if it was towards himself or the other who had reminded him of the bitter truth.

"I'm sorry Toris… I like, really am." He looked at his best friend, obviously hurting in ways that he couldn't even start to help him with. "I wasn't like, planning on bringing this up. It just, came out. Really, I am sorry."

_Something is scratching its way out _

_Something you want to forget about._

He couldn't hear the other anymore; the apologies were drowned out by a loud humming in his head. His anger was trying to take a hold of him. No, no he was better than this. He wouldn't let himself go any further. His friend was just worried, that was no reason to get angry. The black that had gathered around the edges of his vision began to clear and he let a weak smile cover the grimace he was wearing.

" No… it… it is fine Feliks…" he said softly, his voice wavering.

_A part of you that'll never show_

_You're the only one that'll ever know_

He would never let his anger show through. He had done a good enough job so far, no one knew that he had such hostile feelings, and no one would if he had anything to do about it. He already had one slip up, but that wouldn't change anything.

"Toris… like, what's wrong? Seriously." He had to press on, there was no going back.

"I told you, nothing. Don't you understand?" he sounded drained, and looked up to his best friend with sad eyes. "It's nothing you need to worry about. Nothing you need to know."

"It has to be something Toris! It has to be! And I don't understand unless you let me! Why did you do that? Why didn't you ask me for help?" Feliks hadn't meant to say all of that, but listening to Toris, the regret from everything boiled up. The regret of not being able to help, the regret of bringing it up in the first place when this was supposed to help him relax it all pressed against his chest and made it hard to breath. "I don't, like, need to worry but I always will, it is not something I, like, need to know but it is something I must to help!"

_Take it back where it all began_

_Take your time would you understand_

_What it's all about, what it's all about!_

He looked at Poland, deep into his best friends eyes. In their sorrow and worry he could see the day he was taken away. In their loyalty and dedication he could see the days of their childhood. In his words he knew he had lost it all. Looking away from him his eyes filled with thoughts of what his life consisted of now, beatings until he was so weak from blood loss he would have died if he wasn't a country. No food for weeks on end, and when he was let out, work and pain from healing wounds. If it wasn't numbness and misery it was pain and agony, and not even in his caring friend could he find consolation anymore.

Feliks looked on, watching his friend's eyes go from hopeless and desperate, to twisted with pain and anger.

" Liet?" his voice was soft again, afraid he had cut too deep.

_Something is scratching its way out_

_Something you want to forget about._

_No one expects you to get out_

_All on your own with no one around._

" _Shut up!"_ It was surprising and very scary to see his normally kindly friend so… upset."_Shut __**up **__Feliks! _You will never understand! You will never know! You will never get it!" He stood up and paced a bit back and forth in front of the rock, the humming back in his head, the anger boiling over, not having been given quite enough time to cool down. The black the crawled around the edges of Lithuania's vision got worse and worse until he could barely see through the fog.

" Toris… like, calm down, please!" he stood up and reached out to grab his shoulders. He shouldn't have pushed for answer, he shouldn't have done that.

" I said _**shut up!"**_ Toris spun, wretching his friends hands from his shoulder and managing to swing his fist into his friends temple.

_Something is scratching its way out_

_Something you want to forget about_

Felix didn't have time to respond, and was hit square on, knocked out. His body crumbled to the ground.

When Toris's vision cleared he found the worst possible situation.

"No! Feliks!" he fell to the ground beside the unconscious blonde. "No, no! This wasn't supposed to happen!" tears sprung to his eyes.

He didn't deserve to be hurt! Wasn't this what he was trying to stop? He was so horrible; he was going to turn into someone just like Ivan if he wasn't careful. But no, he wouldn't give himself the chance.

_No one expects you to get out_

_All on your own with no one around…._

Leaning down, he brushed the blonde's hair out of the way and kissed where he had hit him before getting to his feet. Tears still streaming down his eyes, he retrieved rope from the workers fence and walked over to the tree that he and Feliks had played in as a child.

"I wonder if I can still climb?" he asked wistfully, smiling. Maybe this time it would be the end? It took him only a few minutes to tie the right knots and soon he was up in the tree, fastening it to the branch.

Looking down at his best friend in the whole wide world, he smiled.

"I won't ever hurt you again."

The noose was slipped over his head, and he slid off the branch.


End file.
